A good friend of mine is getting married later this year, and as I would rather not be the spinster of the parish again at a wedding I decided to make a concerted effort to get back into dating scene this year in the hope I may have someone to go to the wedding with come December.
I had previously been on free on-line dating sites with mixed results so this time joined a subscription site, with the assumption that if people paid to join they’d be more serious about finding a relationship. Thus far, that doesn’t seem to the case, but I’ll reserve judgment until my 3-month membership is up.
I’ve heard from a couple of guys on the site but frustratingly they didn’t then want to have a conversation more than just saying “hi”. Really can’t see the point in that! One chap made contact a couple of weeks ago, and we finally got to have our first date last night. We had spoken on the phone at the weekend – he called me while he was taking a brisk walk so sounded a bit like a heavy breather at times! During that chat he did make the assumption that my being childless was due to “it not happening” for me, rather than a life choice which was a trifle irritating as apparently women feel incomplete without a baby. Yawn. I let that slide; it seems to be a very common misconception (no pun intended!).
He was right at the top end of my age range – 10 years older than me – but looked much younger. He had said he didn’t drink on first dates – but luckily that only lasted until we got to the pub. Although I inadvertently ordered a non-alcoholic drink. Oops. Soon rectified that on the second round.
We work in the same industry and had some music and film likes in common so the conversation flowed fairly easily – the drinks may have helped of course! The age difference was only really apparent when talking about cultural reference points in our childhood and teen years, so there were a few blank looks from each of us at times. One awkward moment – he’d said he had teenage daughters who lived with him, and had a made a couple of references to his ex – so I assumed he was divorced. Turns out he was widowed a few years ago, so that wasn’t a high point. I won’t make that mistake again! However as he wants a second date, I guess he wasn’t too worried about that faux pas.
Overall it was a fun evening, and he was good company and a real gent. We had three drinks and some delicious chips too! However I didn’t feel any spark sadly, so not sure if date number two will be on the cards.
Randomly though, in recent weeks I’ve had out-of-the-blue contact from two guys I knew in my late teens and early 20s; both of whom have suggested going for drinks or coffee. And there’s always the cute & attentive chap at the office. The next few weeks could be interesting, even if the dating site doesn’t deliver quite what it promises. Hope springs eternal, after all….